Author Archives: myrtlevilleswimmers

Right of Reply

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Ms. Ann Smyth has demanded a right of reply to my Ode and herewith same:

I’m sorry Damian you were right

I think your ode is a load of shite 😂😂

So here is one that I have done

I thought it sounded rather fun

Here’s a bit of Cockney rhyming slang

Why don’t you come to Myrtleville to meet the selkie gang?

They’re a team attempting to swim the channel

It would’ve been easier going through the tunnel

Harry is the first one up

He should be as he’s the pup

Second is the one called Laurence

He really can churn up a torrent

Now along comes dear John Kiely

Dare I say it he’s always smiley.

Then comes short arse Smyth

“Hurry up”, “Oh fuck all this”

Now comes stealth bomber Sisk

She won’t take any risks

Oh look who’s coming up the rear

Watson – shit, she’s only one good ear

That’s the team, the Selkie Six

After the channel – we’ll be in bits

Published poet, Ann Smyth, composing and being inspired by fellow Selkie, Brenda Sisk(y) while Smiley Kiely looks on.  Frank Hallissey is just photobombing.

Entries open for rescheduled RNLI Swim – July 13th

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Entries are now open for the rescheduled RNLI Myrtleville-Church Bay Swim on Thursday, July 13th at 7.00 PM.

All entries for June 10th have been carried over.   No need to enter again.  If you can’t take part on the rescheduled date, it would be great if you could let us know – just for organisational purposes.  The RNLI thanks you for your donation, which will be used to save lives at sea  🙂

New entrants, please go to Active and enter here.

The Selkies – an Ode

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Poetry is hard to write.  While the Selkies and their non-stop hard work, dedication, abstinence and laser-like focus are undoubtedly poetically inspirational, it’s still fierce hard to rhyme words.  

With apologies to everyone involved  – especially to anyone who wastes a minute of their life reading this – herewith is my all-new, rhymically-challenged, Ode to the Selkies.

If you meet a Selkie down beside the sea
You may not know which one is which, so just enquir(e)y

You can make a start and ask if the name is Harry
Failing that, move right on and try out Laurence (Larry)

If no is still the answer, keep pressing on
Maybe think outside the box and ask is it Watson

If you still haven’t got it, it might be a Kiely
Check for a ‘tache – and he’s often quite smiley

The fifth chance to try is could it be Ann Smyth
If it as and you ask her she’ll say this ode is shit(h)

You’ll never catch the last one as she’s very, very frisky
It’s very hard to pin her down, that one called Brenda Sisk(y)

I promised Bernard Lynch I wouldn’t disgrace everyone in Myrtleville again after my Ballad of Gordon Adair effort.  Sorry about that, Bernard.

Selkies, Open Water Swimming in Cork, Ireland

One of the many ode-inspiring images of some of the hard working, focused Selkies.  

Collective Noun for Selkies?

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A bit of a problem here.  I’m seeking input from the educated masses who populate the beach. I can’t seem to find the correct collective noun for Selkies – and their channel relay team of the same name.

Since there will be a lot of talk about this gang/posse/swarm/tiding/totter/ubiquity/quiver over the next few weeks, I need to get it right.

Diligent research has unearthed gems such as “a party of jays”, “a smack (or smuth) of jellyfish”, “an obstinacy of buffalo”, ” a gam of whales” etc.etc.  No Selkies.

I even found the correct collective noun for Sandycovers – “a trip of goats” (no, I didn’t make that up). Still, no Selkies.

Any suggestions, please?  In the official team picture below, might they be “a rockful of Selkies”?  Or would they be categorised by colour – “a Navy of Selkies”?

Myrtleville Selkies English Channel Relay Team

An early suggestion from Denis Condon that it would be “a langerload of Selkies” was discarded.  Valid suggestions only to whatsheonaboutnow@myrtlevilleswimmers.com.

The winning entry gets Selkie autographs at the RNLI Myrtleville-Church Bay swim on June 10.   Better enter, or you might miss out.