By popular demand and with thanks RMcK Poetry Productions (all rights reserved)…..

When Shivers asked me to speak
I thought I’d write a poem
So I hope you all remember Emily Dickinson from your Leaving Cert
Because her poems were a bit odd!

My name is Rosaleen
And I’m from B’town
I always wee in my wetsuit
And I refuse to swim at dawn

But now enough about me
Let’s discuss the rest of them
Who are at their happiest
Swimming out to the Dutchman

Afterwards, there’s always banter
And sometimes a fuss
If Mrs Gossip Smyth, has brought
Yes, you’ve guessed it, Dunnsey-Nuts!

Caroline wasn’t sure when asked
She didn’t know how many of us
Someone called the Lifeboat for Bonnie
Excuse my French, twas Fucking Ridiculous!

Mrs V doesn’t like seals
Miss O’Connor used to be nervous
And as for Tara swimming in winter
May the Lord preserve us!

Our Ruth was the new girl
From yonder in Monkstown
If you need frothy milk on the beach
This lady won’t let you down!

The swims I do most often
Bryan calls the Friday Club
It’s all about the swimming I swear
And not about the River’s End grub!

Our poor children barely notice
But the teachers and other kids must
When Michelle, Mrs V, Siobhan and I
Do the Friday school run in wetsuits and Uggs!

Our Bryan’s often away
Off foreign in Afghanistan
Those O’Connells will really do anything
To ensure a winter tan!

Then there’s our other boys
Bendy, Tim, Harry, Landy, Buzz & Sean
Don’t know why I’m suddenly
Thinking of our Siobhan?

Speaking of whom
We’re so lucky with our team photographer
If only we looked more glamorous
On exiting the water

As some of us are Triathletes
We need to mention riding
And cycling too I suppose
Though we mustn’t tell Fiona how fast Sean cycles down that Strava hill!

Crosser Tri must be mentioned
For this poem to be complete
Fair play to Bernard & Suzie
It’s a pleasure to compete

Well maybe not for one girl
Who hurled her way through the run
Far too competitive you see
Sara, it’s supposed to be fun!

Gary arranged to swim at sunrise
He was so worried about 40’s tedium
What better way to swim when old
Than being held up by helium?

I know it was in Kerry
But it has to be brought up
“Beat the wives” Sean and Bendy called the team
Oh well lads, hard luck!

Thanks also to Joleen
Who sorted all the graphics
We had two Facebook events
Poor Venn was expecting traffic!

Now here’s my rhyming challenge
I haven’t mentioned Mrs G or Sportacus
Nor the tall tall blondes,
Flahs!

And finally the die-hards
Who definitely keep logs
And won’t be seen in wetsuits
Cos they’re total rides in togs!

Bernard, Damian and Carol swam 24k
Most can’t even run that far
Good thinking by Michelle
Who lashed on the lights in her car

It’s almost time
To bring this to an end
But I do need to say
I’m proud to call you all my friends

So that’s the end of my little rhyme
And in case you’d forgotten about Miss Dickinson
Good night!