Please arrange your travel plans to car pool if it all possible. Be aware of the traffic diversions getting to Church Bay.

Parking in Church Bay and in Myrtleville will be very limited. Work with the stewards. Parking is available in the Rugby Club at the top of the hill in Myrtleville.

After the visit from Daithi last week, I was sure I was on for a scriptwriter job on the all-new Today with Daithi and Bernie Show, starring our own Bernie Lynch. Unfortunately, it now seems Harry Casey has got in there ahead of me and is writing Rom-Com dramas. His first script is below (published on some misspelled version of this venerable site and – let’s be honest – with a fair bit of plagiarism) and it’s worthy of a reprint here. Fame. At last.

From Harry “watch your back” Casey:

It seemed almost too good to be true. A brave, lone Myrtlevillian embarks on a quest to commune with fame and meets many obstacles in his way, namely some Magnificent Mermaids and Mermen – AKA the other Myrtleville swimmers rudely barging into his photos with Kerry’s finest export (aside from the butter and the horse who went to France). With these images beamed around the world (it’ll be on RTE anyway), Damian O’Neill has been inundated with offers from Hollywood for a film about his experience. The project – with the working title “Swims with Daithí” (like Costner in that wolf thingie years ago) – is being cast (Clint Eastwood is on to play Damian, apparently, but Damian reckons he’s not macho enough) and we hear plans are in place to engage Peter Foott with his local knowledge of filming on the beach for the Young Offenders.

Being the cute hoor that Damian is – in case the movie doesn’t work out – he has trademarked the images below and has plans to set up a stall selling t-shirts and mugs with pictures of said rare images, outside of Bernie’s Siopa in the village on Saturday morning.

So, Damian – enjoy it while it lasts, but keep the day job. This one might go down the tubes yet. You can’t trust those fillum fellas.

*Any similarities between this article and any previously published articles by another author are purely coincidental.

**This article is absolutely not being published in retaliation