Marathon swimming legend, Ned Denison, finished third in our RNLI swim last Saturday.  He quietly skipped the presentations to get ready for an attempt to swim from the Fastnet to Baltimore on Sunday.

Unfortunately, things went against Ned from the outset.  Having graced the pesky Myrtlevillians with his presence, he discovered on Sunday that his prized hat and ear plugs had been stolen, swiped, lifted or otherwise robbed – by a villain, no doubt.

Suspicion centres on Myrtlevillians out to sabotage Ned’s 10,072nd Marathon swim. Accusations are flying that there are Myrtlevillains* amongst us Myrtlevillians**.  We strongly refute this allegation.  There are no villains in the Myrtlevillians.

It’s not as if there’s any proof it was one of us – although there was some phone footage of a dodgy looking character from outside Cronin’s on Saturday night.

You’re still a legend, Ned.  Welcome in Myrtleville any time.  We’re short dry-robes and towels, if you wanted to bring a few spare with you the next day.  We’re grand for hats – if you want a loan of one.

*Villain:  A bad guy – or gal.

**Villian: Denizen of the ‘Ville.

***Ned: Denison, not a Denizen of the ‘Ville.  Always welcome, though.